"All I Ever Have To Be, Is What YOU Made Me"
By Amy Grant

When the weight of all my dreams
Is resting heavy on my head,
And the thoughtful words of health and hope
Have all been nicely said.

But I'm still hurting,
Wondering if I'll ever be
The one I think I am.

I think I am.

Then you gently re-remind me
That you've made me from the first,
And the more I try to be the best
The more I get the worst.

And I realize the good in me,
Is only there because of who you are.

Who you are...

And all I ever have to be
Is what you've made me.
Any more or less would be a step
Out of your plan.

As you daily recreate me,
Help me always keep in mind
That I only have to do
What I can find.

And all I ever have to be
All I have to be
All I ever have to be
Is what you've made me.

Listening to some Old School music while I work, this song came across my itunes & as I listened to the lyrics, it caught me off-guard, emotionally.

Brian left the kids & I to pursue a job back in Spokane. It has been 16 months that we have been living with my mother-in-law and beyond the normal challenges of living in someone else's house & cramped quarters, there is also an emotional challenge of an old message, like an old friend has returned, that has played over & over again. The message is one many of us know, for it (he)loves to steal, kill and destroy. (John 10:10)

"You are not good enough," is something like how it goes. That little line has been something I've fought against over the years, but sometimes circumstances can be used to intensify these negative messages.


So, when I listened closely to this song, the lyrics struck a tender chord of insecurity and vulnerability in me that remind me how I just want to please. I desire to please people and God. I try so hard sometimes, trying to love, be caring, but now cautious to set boundaries, and own what is mine and not what is someone else's. I know what I mean to be and want to be, but wonder if other people catch that? "All I ever have to be is what You've made me. Any more of less would be a step out of Your plan," says God.

What a relief! Thank you God for loving and creating me, who You wanted me to be! I know I don't execute things perfectly, but You know my heart and have such Grace for me! Praise God.