Blessed to battle

Have you ever realized that life is work? I blame that on Eve. The most basic of things requires battle. I am mostly talking about relationship, specifically, marriage. We have been married almost 19 years and fighting for a great marriage requires true determination. This is not a confession of relational discord, merely an acknowledgement of the endurance, strength, and the fight it is to keep it. I may have said this before, but I realize that life in not a gentle stroll uphill. It doesn't start at the bottom and go up from there. It is up, down, up, down, down-some-more, plateau, down-even-further and then truly UP! (Thank God the end of the journey is not merely death!) Choosing to journey and traverse life with someone complicates life. "It's complicated," can be both bad and good. I'm blessed to share it alongside Brian, but it does take work. Our treasured friends are battling cancer, alongside of life. I imagine staring sickness in the face while continuing to do kids, meals, marriage, work...must take a strength beyond. I wonder if there's guilt when relationship is tough in the midst of illness? I think I should appreciate more and criticize less, I really want to feel as blessed as I am. I don't want to lose in order to realize. I've had and lost and unfortunately, it wasn't until I lost that I got it! I know that, and yet, how do you get it while you have it? My answer is always GOD, sometimes its like a Sunday-school question...the answer is always Jesus! LORD, help me to experience the blessings I already have. Humble my heart to feel choose, to be thankful and grateful for the gifts you have given me in the now.