China 2008 Missions Group

Tonight was our first meeting with the Valley Fourth Memorial 2008 China Missions Team. We met our team members, led by Pastor, Steve Allen, who is also an adoptive father. They welcomed us with such love and acceptance, beyond what we would have ever expected. We spent about an hour learning two Chinese songs, then talked business, about completing our Visa application, fundraising and our future meetings. The date set as a goal to have our finances raised and completed is May 14th. The rest of the group has been raising money for this trip since December, so although we are not going on the touring that they will be doing, we are far behind what they have been able to raise.
It blessed and reaffirmed this journey for us, when Steve sharing of Tim's call to him after speaking with us about making this trip. Tim knew that this Missions trip was full, but asked Steve to make it happen with us as a part! Even though we have felt God's hand print all over this, there are always doubts. We are only human and when left to our own devices, we fail miserably!
We are having an auction, so anyone have anything to donate, we would be grateful.
Too tired to continue tonight...but we've had some douses of days with Grace that I'll share at a later time. BTW, Happy Birthday, to our Niece, Avery, who turns 6 today! Unbelievable that she is that old!

Bonding

I have been doing a lot of reading about adoption "disruptions," when a family receives a child, but does not continue through with the adoption. It is truly heartbreaking and even the adoption community is divided. I was discussing with Brian, how blessed we are to have had such amazing bonding with Grace. It seemed natural, we were intentional about many things (in fact we still give her a bottle at night to promote bonding) but she never outright rejected either of us. Then, just today, at a friends house, she gave me a run for my money! She completely freaked out about a toy/sharing issue and became hysterical. Now you may be saying, "a normal two-year old thing," but that, it was not! She refused to look into my eyes, she reverted to scratching my face, as she first did when we got her, did not want to be held and tried everything from tying to change the topic to physically fighting me to be held. To be honest, I didn't have a plan and only knew that she would not win in removing herself from me. I had to show her that no matter her level of withdrawl and "naughtiness" I would still be there. Both my friend and I sensed the scaryness and possible impact in this battle, and it was emotional for us, as well! I think we ended okay, and we are going to be much more intentional about eye-contact for the next while. She definately will avoid it unless pressed at times. Just a reminder that even in the best circumstances, adoption and being institutionalized carries consequences and leaves scars.

As for our trip, please be praying as we continue to search out the best prices for our flight. We need to book soon, but want to use our resources as wisely as possible.

Exciting Chapter

We are, Brian, Gretchen, Jonah, Carter and Grace! We began this site to share in the newest exciting chapter, as well as share the ups and downs of our daily lives.
A week ago, we sent an e-mail to a contact that we had heard speak at a local church. His name is Tim Baker, and he is the Founder and Director of The Philip Hayden Foundation.(http://www.chinaorphans.org/) This organization, in short, works with the Chinese Goverment Orphanages that receive children who have anywhere from critical to minor needs for medical attention and surgery's. This is a private, non-profit group, run under God's provisions. They have several "houses" throughout China where these children are cared for, there needs provided for, and then adopted into loving families. Back to our story...later that day, we received a phone call from Tim Baker, calling from China! Having remembered meeting in Spokane, and hearing about our proposal to come and share our love of photography and China, he was thrilled and wanted to counter our offer. Instead of waiting until Summer 2009, with our own financial means, he offered to assist with a portion of the travel cost, and complete coverage for housing and two meals a day! (we will be staying at the orphanage) With tears of joy, completely in shock and awe, we couldn't help but know that indeed God had heard the desires of our hearts and my many cries to return to the birth land of our daughter. China offered us so much and with the many children still without forever families, there is always more work to be done!
Today, we confirmed with Tim, our excitement and desire to accept his offer. He suggested we travel with the Valley Fourth Memorial church and we liked the idea of being a part of a group, even though we'd have our own mission. We surprisingly found out that they were travelling at the end of June, into July, earlier than we had anticipated! Matthew Barnett states, "You have to believe in your dream because God in Heaven supports you and His influence is far greater than the influence of men." (The Church that Never Sleeps) Again, not our time, but God's! It is completely beyond our ability to make this possible, so God can and will receive the Glory for the miracle of this becoming a reality. There are an extrodinary amount of details, from who will care for our children, what equipment will we need to take, how will we pay our portion of the airlines tickets and can we undertake such a huge project? We have begun researching and know that the details are not ours to control, but to hand over to God. He has us just where He wants, eager to serve, no experience and no means to do it on our own! Hebrews 11:1 "For faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." (Seeing in advance, is how our Pastor described this verse)

Our History

We have created this site to share our lives with those we love. A brief history until a later time that I can explain in more detail. So, here's the fast-track version: Brian & I meet in 1991, in College, marry in 1994, in 1997, decide to begin a family, in which we realize that we are destined to difficulties. Blessings flowed and in 1999, our first son was born, with son #2 not far behind in 2000 and a pure miracle! Several years later, we once again had the desire to add to our family. We re-visited some dark moments of infertility, as we had experienced earlier, but this time it ended with devastating results. We felt dejected and empty and mourned for a time. The desire to adopt had been a discussion we'd had early in our marriage, but now at this crosspoint, it resurfaced with a new sense of hope for our family! In October 2004, we submitted our first paperwork with Bethany Christian Services to adopt a daughter from China. Two grueling years of evaluation under a microscope by The States and China, waiting when we thought we couldn't bear one more minute, and then finally, A Picture! In June 2006, we got our Referral, a short and vague history on our daughter and three precious pictures. August 21, 2006 we received Gao Shao Bin, now Gracyn Esabella ShaoBin. Our hearts and lives were forever changed. As Matthew Barnett so beautifully states in "The Church that Never Sleeps," "When you put yourself in another man's world, you learn how to have vision. All of the vision was born in the valley. You see, in the valley we are close to the need. It's the place where we see the hurt. After we saw a need, a vision came to fulfill that need." We saw beautiful children, in need. Our hearts responded and now, beyond our dreams, we are faced with a proposal to return to China this Summer to make a difference to orphans who deserve a family and so much more. This leads us beginning this blog. Stay tuned for the story of our lives! And thanks for your support!