Bonding

I have been doing a lot of reading about adoption "disruptions," when a family receives a child, but does not continue through with the adoption. It is truly heartbreaking and even the adoption community is divided. I was discussing with Brian, how blessed we are to have had such amazing bonding with Grace. It seemed natural, we were intentional about many things (in fact we still give her a bottle at night to promote bonding) but she never outright rejected either of us. Then, just today, at a friends house, she gave me a run for my money! She completely freaked out about a toy/sharing issue and became hysterical. Now you may be saying, "a normal two-year old thing," but that, it was not! She refused to look into my eyes, she reverted to scratching my face, as she first did when we got her, did not want to be held and tried everything from tying to change the topic to physically fighting me to be held. To be honest, I didn't have a plan and only knew that she would not win in removing herself from me. I had to show her that no matter her level of withdrawl and "naughtiness" I would still be there. Both my friend and I sensed the scaryness and possible impact in this battle, and it was emotional for us, as well! I think we ended okay, and we are going to be much more intentional about eye-contact for the next while. She definately will avoid it unless pressed at times. Just a reminder that even in the best circumstances, adoption and being institutionalized carries consequences and leaves scars.

As for our trip, please be praying as we continue to search out the best prices for our flight. We need to book soon, but want to use our resources as wisely as possible.